Teganjaz Books Presents... Author, Tracy L. Darity

April is Autism Awareness Month.

Twenty-two years ago I gave birth to my daughter Jasmin. She was a sweet gentle spirit that did not cause much fuss. She was content lying in her crib for hours, mesmerized by the Winnie the Pooh mobile dangling above. At the time I was so happy. I was twenty-three and had no clue that my life was about to change in more ways than one. At nine months Jasmin suffered an unexplainable seizure. By age two she was said to be Autistic. I had no idea what Autisim was or what it would mean to our lives as we knew it.

I continued to treat Jasmin the same as I did my other daughter who is two years older. She learned to walk, drink from a cup, feed herself, and even was potty trained. The only thing separating her progress from that of other children her age was, she did not talk. She would gesture her needs, pointing and pulling and moving about. When she turned three, she was moved from the center known as PARC (Pinellas Association For Retarded Children?a horrible name, but a wonderful facility), and placed in public school. The same school she will graduate from this June.

Through the years Jasmin has received both Speech and Occupational Therapy. While other children were being taught sign language, I was told that Jasmin was capable of speaking but just refused to. By teaching her sign language we would be hindering her from ever wanting to speak. To this day the only fluent word Jasmin has ever spoken is ?mama.? As someone once said to me, ?isn?t that the most important word?? ?

I don?t know if my youth helped me through the years or if it was hope beyond all hope that one day she would just snap out of it. What I do know is that she has been a source of happiness throughout our lives that give true meaning to the saying, ?don?t sweat the small stuff.? Jasmin is the happiest most carefree person I have known. She has a jubilant spirit and contagious smile plastered across her face at all times. She makes us laugh when we don?t want to laugh and gives us a sense of joy when we are feeling blue. Her favorite things are hugs, kisses, the Game Show Network, and any channel, (TV or Radio) that communicates in Spanish. She loves to sing, humming her favorite songs so clearly that deep down inside you know if she would just try hard enough she could open her mouth and enunciate the words.

I would be remised if I led you to believe that everyday has been a great day. There have been some days through the years when I thought my heart would break from disappointment and embarrassment. Days like when my daughter graduated from high school and family and friends had gathered at The Cheesecake Factory. We took Jasmin to the restroom and she through a fit. Management, patrons, and family did everything to calm her down. Then as quickly as the spell came over her it went away. And there was the time we were in Miami and we decided to go to the mall. Jasmin carried on so badly that emergency officials were called. The Sheriffs Deputy approached and Jasmin took her hand and walked off like she didn?t know us. Thirty minutes later she was laughing and trying to drown us in hugs and kisses. As trying as these moments have been they no way outweigh the good days.

About two years ago while giving Jasmin her bath, she collapsed. It was quite a scare. She was taken to All Children?s Hospital (the best in the world) and after numerous tests was found to be in perfect health. They attributed the fainting spell to the room and water temperature, plus the fact that she had not eaten yet. We were to follow-up with a neurologist a few weeks later, which we did. After running several tests on Jasmin we were called into the Neurologists office. He asked me how I knew Jasmin was Autistic, who diagnosed her, what tests did they run, etc. He then went on to tell me that all of her brain activity was normal. I joked, ?So are you saying she isn?t Autistic?? His response left me speechless. He replied in a very matter-of-fact tone, ?Well I guess since you have raised her for eighteen years to be Autistic then at this point she is Autistic.? I wanted to know what could be done to make her whole, and in that same tone he replied, ?At this point nothing really.?

I think that day was more surreal than the day she was initially diagnosed. Back then I did not have a clear understanding of what Autism really meant. On this day I was overwhelmed by the knowledge of knowing what it is and knowing that my daughter may have been forced to be this way due to my lack of knowledge and the lack of information provided back then.

When I read the statistics on Autism and the number of children affected by this disease, I can?t help but wonder how many have been placed under this umbrella because the Doctors and other specialist don?t have the right answers or training. I pray that more studies are conducted and research is funded to cure this disease. And if someone tells you that your child has Autism, please get a second, third, forth, and fifth opinion.

Now, I know some of you may be wondering about the title of my blog. Well, remember I told you that Jasmin can hum songs so clearly that you can almost hear the words. If you ask her to sing you a song, she immediately goes into a lively rendition of the childhood tune, ?The Is The Song That Never Ends.? The song is so fitting because life with Jasmin has been a journey that just keeps repeating itself and the love she has is endless.

This is the song that never ends,

it just goes on and on my friends

Some people started singing it, not knowing what it was,

and they'll continue singing it forever just because...

(repeat the chorus over and over and over)

Tracy L. Darity is the Author of ?He Loves Me He Loves Me Not!?

Much Love,

Tracy

www.TracyLDarity.com

www.TracyLDarity.ning.com

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"A friend is someone who knows your favorite song and can sing it back to you long after the words have faded from your memory."